ParentPoints

This blog is for all parents; those in the traditional workforce, those who work from home, and those who work at home. Join our conversations about balancing the needs of family with the demands of work, discovering resources and activities around Alaska, and opening a dialogue about the perks and challenges of parenthood. One of our three contributors emphasizes teen and family issues. We welcome your comments but please keep them on point and civil. Avoid personal attacks and the use of profanity.

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Where is the line?

I love Sunday evenings. They are a time for relaxation before the start of the work week. My routine is to get the kids to bed then make some tea and get onto Facebook to see what everyone in my online community is up to. I read the posts, often make comments and then direct message my Mom friends to set up play dates for the week.

I was going about this routine Sunday when I came across some offensive photos of a young lady (college aged) and her friends on my feed. I was floored at what I saw. At the very minimum, the photos would qualify as soft porn.

I added this young lady as a friend because I know her parents and have known her since she was a little girl. I deleted her as a Facebook friend, and emailed abuse@facebook.com to report the photos, which have hopefully been removed from the internet. But I’m still disturbed.

Her parents are really solid people. What motivated her to post such photos? What do her parents think? Do they know? Should I call them? How am I as a parent going to empower my kids to make good decisions in a sexualized society where information flows so quickly?

I love technology. I have a 3GS iPhone. I have a Flip Mino that shoots in high definition. I’m on Twitter and Facebook constantly. The majority of my freelance work is internet based. I’m on the bandwagon, but wonder, where is the line?

We live in a day and age where personal things aren’t so personal anymore. I’m a culprit. I tweet about my day, post photos of my kids, my snacks, my chocolate treats, my coffee cravings and my dog. I share and I watch others who share. I check out the profiles of those I follow, some of which are strangers. I look at their photos and learn details, often intimate details, about their lives. Sometimes I’m uncomfortable about the things I learn. Is that an indication that we’ve gone over the line? Have we breached personal boundaries to the point where it is hard to determine what the line is, or if one should even exist? Or, are we an advanced society that has created powerful tools to share information, to change communities, business models, election outcomes, even large-scale efforts such as Health Care Reform? Are those causes more important than boundaries or comfort zones? Or, is there a healthy balance? If so, how do we find it?

Then I wonder about my friend’s daughter and ponder if there will come a day when this young lady regrets posting those photos. Will they jeopardize a job she really wants? Could she lose a relationship? Or are we already beyond that, living in a society that accepts and perhaps even expects that kind of behavior?

And, I come full circle, back to my family and my question, how am I as a parent going to empower my kids to make good decisions in a sexualized society where information flows so quickly?

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