Birth & Beginnings: childbirth conversations

Hello mothers and mothers-to-be! This blog focuses on pregnancy, childbirth, children, and parenting. Along with providing helpful information and resources, it is also a place to discuss choices and trends in these areas. The blog will inform and encourage mothers as we share and learn from each other. It is not a place to say that one opinion is better than another; instead it is a forum for camaraderie and for sharing personal experiences. So feel free to read, respond, and absorb information on a daily basis as together we traverse this world of motherhood.


Laura Tolman, CCE, LSP

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Laura Tolman is a local certified childbirth educator and labor support professional. She also works as a postpartum doula. She and her husband are long time Alaskans and are the parents and forming relationships with families while learning about other cultures. In her free time Laura enjoys writing freelance articles, poetry, and the performing arts. Her favorite pastime is being with family and coaxing uproarious laughter out of her young son.

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Mom, the Ultimate Multi-tasker - 6/3/2008 10:00 pm

Mommy and Baby Separation - 5/29/2008 10:00 pm

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How long to exclusively breastfeed? - 5/15/2008 4:56 pm

The “Business of Being Born” Review - 5/13/2008 8:32 am

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Dogs and Babies

Posted by mamas

Posted: May 5, 2008 - 10:11 pm

Man’s best friend they may be, but how will they relate to a baby? Canine temperaments vary greatly and are often swayed by factors such as breed and social history. It is common for couples to own a dog well before they ever decide to have children, which can lead to problems with the arrival of a new family member. It is important to do your research and prepare your dog for the changes which will inevitably occur with this transition.

When our three year old dog passed away just 5 months prior to our baby’s due date, we were devastated. Although we knew that it would have been hard on our dog to share us with the baby, we had been looking forward to them eventually becoming friends and growing up together. Having already decided that we needed a dog in our family, we began to search for that special puppy that would make a good baby companion.

Finally we found a breed that was good with children and met my hypo-allergenic requirements as well. I knew deep down that it was well beyond crazy to take on puppy training shortly before bringing home our newborn, but there was a dog-sized whole in our hearts to be filled, and when my parents offered to purchase the pet as a gift for us, we could not say no.

During my pregnancy, we read books and information about how to help the dog adjust to a new baby. We even let her sniff the baby clothes and really get the scent of the baby before bringing our son home. When the crucial meeting time came, we were so impressed at how our spastic puppy, turned mushy and soft around a baby. She stopped jumping, licking, and running. The dog was transfixed with the little form of a boy, and settled down beside him to cuddle.

Now with a toddler in the house, she romps and plays and they knock each other over, all in good fun. They are the best of friends. But I’m still impressed with our dog’s behavior each time she is around children and how she immediately mellows in proportion to the child’s age. Of course, she does require almost as much attention as our son, but we are glad to put the effort into both of them.

That being said, a pet owner has to do a lot more work when bringing a child home to a well-established family dog or a high maintenance puppy. Sometimes the owner will go to the extent of walking around with a fake baby in their arms for months prior to the birth, just to get the dog use to less attention. A pet owner should utilize that 40 week time period to prepare for the baby in every way, and that includes prepping their dog as well.

There are books to read, lectures to attend, or classes to take. Many parents take their pets through obedience school before having children. Some companies, such as Alaska Dog Sports, even offer specific classes for expectant parents who are dog owners. Through the Baby Smarts course a parent will learn how to manage, train and prepare their dog prior to the baby’s arrival. Perhaps it is possible for “man’s best friend” to be a baby’s best friend after all.

If you have tips or stories about dogs and babies, feel free to share.


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  2     May 6, 2008 - 8:27am | Beth_451

Dog Temperments

When my parents had a baby later in life, we weren't sure how our mature set-in-her-ways dog, Esther, would respond. Although she was small, she didn't do well with other dogs and would scare dogs twice her size into submission . She barked ferociously at strangers, and eyed small children suspiciously when they approached her food or toys--but she loved and protected our family with a passion.

As mom's belly expanded, Esther loved to curl up to it. She rarely left my mother's side and guarded her protectively. When my mother got a dangerous stomach flu in her second trimester, Esther was sick too and refused to eat. When my mother began to recover, Esther was able to start eating too. We saw these signs as danger and hoped that we wouldn't have to turn our short-hair, indoor dog into the cold when the baby arrived.

However, from the first day that little Isaac came home, Esther gave the baby lots of space, never jumped up near him or made a single move of agressive behavior of any kind. As Isaac grew to toddler tail-pulling stage, Esther tolerated being touched and tugged at without complaint. The wariness she showed with strange children around her toys and food NEVER displayed itself with Isaac and then little brother Adam. Although she wasn't a playful puppy, she knew her family and protected and loved all of us until the end. It was hard on all of us to say good-bye.

Now my husband and I "parent" a lovable, friendly, slightly willful pug named Titus who wiggles his way into our lap and heart. Although it will be a big adjustment someday when there is baby at home, and he isn't the center of our lives anymore, we have watched him play with children of all ages and feel good about his temperment. We watched a two year old run around with his toy only a few steps ahead of him. Although he could have snatched the toy out of her hands, knocked her over, or done any number of things, he always waited patiently for her to get tired and drop it or throw it. When greeting a small baby, though, his first response is to lick it's face--so we'll have to work on that behavior! I think over all, though, our dog will be a good fit for new small people!

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  May 6, 2008 - 10:12am | mamas

Dog Temperments

Thanks for sharing Beth, I'm sure at the proper time, Titus will be the perfect friend for your baby :-) -- Laura Tolman

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  1     May 6, 2008 - 7:44am | Akdogsports

What a nice story

I would like to add that it really is important to have a plan and prepare your dog for the baby's arrival. Some dogs may not have any problems; others that have been the 'baby' in the house may object to having their routine and all of the attention redirected. A baby can be 'scary' to a dog, especially one that has noise sensitivity issues or is sensitive when it's humans get stressed out.

I've listened to many stories from people that felt they had no other choice but to rehome their dog after a baby comes into the house because of stress over the dogs behavior. Even the most exhuberant dog can learn to have some manners around a baby and the new parents can learn some easy managment tools.

If you are good at searching out information on your own there are many good books on how to prepare your dog for the baby, it is just a matter of making it a priority and getting started.

The Baby Smarts lecture class that we've put together is designed to give you that extra boost and really share a lot of information. The goal is to make you feel like you have the 'tools' to be successful.

Having a home where baby and 'Rover' can become best friends is a wonderful thing!

Liz
Alaska Dog Sports

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