OCTOBER 10, 2006 - 5:16 PM
In an eerie echo of a typical Don Young election, MARY MINOR, trounced all comers with her feint-and-strike attack. Unlike Don, Mary used English with precision and wit, leaving out all unnecessary words and details. Deft work Mary.
We'll be back next week, sorting through the wreckage of Alaska politics and making art out of pomposity, stupidty, insanity and bufoonery. Can you stand to wait 'til then?
Peter Dunlap-Shohl
Adn Cartoonist
OCTOBER 3, 2006 - 4:17 PM
The hometown crowd goes wild as SHARON VANVALIN brings yet another top finish to Haines, the humor capital of Alaska. The long-standing argument about just where the humor capitol will be took an interesting turn this week when Sarah Palin firmly committed to keep it in Haines, although she did admit at a recent forum that she plans to move slapstick humor to Wasilla. Vic Kohring will be comedian in residence, but is expected to phone in some of his work from Portland. And of course, Palin has made no secret of her desire to bring her "Take a Stand" stand-up comedy troupe to Juneau. Humor experts expect the entire divisive debate to be resolved shortly as the entire state of Alaska has become a laughing stock, thanks to the recent virtuoso political comedy stylings of Don, Ted, and Frank.
SEPTEMBER 26, 2006 - 3:07 PM
A honk of the air horn for the crisp dialog and subtle word sense of Anchorage's own LEO WASSILIE. Leo's tight writing and witty choice of "frank", with its dual meanings (frank= truthful, Frank = Murkowski, Frank Murkowski= oxymoron) landed him in the Name that 'Toon winner's circle with all the rights, privileges and duties thereunto appertaining.
It was an entertaining week for me as I watched you guys adapt to the dialogue format. As I work on daily deadlines I find it's healthy to change formulas- dialogue one day, a song parody the next, the occasional caption-free picture that does the work with sheer powerful imagery, followed up by the verbose "Look at me, I'm Jules Freakin' Feiffer!" novella. (BTW, fans of the captionless cartoon should check here for the work of the master of this form, Clay Bennett.)
SEPTEMBER 19, 2006 - 4:58 PM
Ok, so four p.m. rolled around Friday and we had a tie. Muttering under my breath, I donned my judicial robes and assumed my most arbitrary and capricious attitude. I drew the Official Name That 'Toon Tie-breaker Coin from my pocket, pausing to admire the "heads" side, a handsome profile of David Byrne, then turned it over to the "tails" side, with its vivid rendering of Ted Nugent. I retreated to my judicial chambers where I tossed the coin repeatedly until it gave me the outcome I wanted.
SEPTEMBER 12, 2006 - 4:25 PM
MARY MINOR strikes again with a pitch-perfect parody of "Folsom Prison Blues" by Johnny Cash. It's impossible to sing it with a straight face as it delivers satiric punch with panache. There is some irony here in that VECO worked hard recently to put a private prison deal together. The cartooning possibilities are so rich that it's tempting to wish that they succeeded. But let's not get greedy. There's more than enough raw material in this state for cartooning.
SEPTEMBER 5, 2006 - 3:02 PM
A one-two finish for for the incorrigible TIM KELLEY of Anchorage. Sorting out several ties this round was a cruel task, given the many great entries you folks sent. We had dingos, distracting strippers, Ted Nugent, and Paul Revere's great-great grandson. And be sure you didn't miss Vern's "Danny Boy" gag, a piece of hilariously inspired absurdity.
The decision in ties went to the caption that related most to the drawing.
I'll have a new drawing for you next Tuesday.
AUGUST 29, 2006 - 5:25 PM
Let the bells ring out and the banners fly for SANDY MATTHEWS of Kasilof, who laid down a caption that dovetailed snugly with the emotional content of the drawing. Elegant work, Sandy.
We're not getting inundated with votes, I'd be interested in hearing from you all about what you think voting adds, if anything, to "Name That 'Toon".
My theory was that it would be fun for you folks to have the chance to shape the outcome as much as possible. No? Yes? More study needed?
AUGUST 22, 2006 - 2:33 PM
Congratulations again to Anchorage's TIM "KAPTAIN KAPTION" KELLEY. Selflessly courting a repetitve strain injury putting up caption after caption, he turned in a winner by counterpointing the frenzy of the image with the whimsey of his imaginative coinage of "Tundrahog Day".
Thanks as always to all of you who sent in captions, I'm constantly amazed at the stuff you come up with. A couple more months of this and we can probably qualify for a bulk discount at a reputable therapist. With luck, they'll give us a Rorschach test.
AUGUST 15, 2006 - 4:08 PM
BAM! The drummer whacks a resounding rim shot for MARY MINOR, not of Haines, who crafted a sizzling zinger with a nifty pop culture reference to the movie "Fight Club".
In the movie, troubled souls join a disturbing club where they meet and wallop the tar out of one another. Members are forbidden to tell outsiders about their brutal pastime.
Mary's line works beautifully. It's a neat skewering of the fracas at the GOP Unity Picnic involving Palin supporters and the party establishment. (You can read about the dust-up on The Trail campaign blog by Kyle Hopkins.)
AUGUST 8, 2006 - 6:55 PM
Congratulations to serial quipper TIM KELLEY of Anchorage. Tim wallpapered the vicinity with 19 captions earning him a special citation for endurance and a visit by the Name that 'toon Performance Investigation Snoop Squad (PISS) who will be collecting a yellow sticky from Tim to test for performance-altering substances, in this case, nitrous oxide. Sorry Tim, but a guy just can't be this funny this frequently without raising suspicions.
We here at NTT Industries wish to say that this is merely a routine procedure and in no way is prompted by any accusations, inklings, unusual smells or evidence of any kind beyond the submission of 19 FREAKIN' CAPTIONS!!! 19!!!!!!
AUGUST 1, 2006 - 5:04 PM
The votes are in, the tumult and the shouting have died, and we have a clear winner. The people's choice, you know him, you love him, Soldotna's own VERN NUSUNGINYA. Vern has made caption history as the first Name that 'Toon victor to be elected fair and square by a vote of the people. Vern took the high road, no negative campaigning, no questionable financial contributions, no empty promises, and not a single illegal yard sign. A high standard has been set.
JULY 25, 2006 - 4:06 PM
Hats off to JAMES STUART of Anchorage for coming up with the hilarious anatomy lesson that scored first place. His punch line wickedly skewers the preposterous idea that a $50.00 head tax will be a disincentive to tourists. Let's get real- a cruise is all about spending money. The game here is conspicuous consumption, and making it more expensive will perversely raise tour allure to those who are looking for a showy way to flaunt their ability to sustain massive damage to their bank accounts. We're looking for people who have the means and the motive to dispose of their excess wealth.
A $50 head tax will only deter those who are too broke to come here in the first place. It's not like the economically marginal types out there are saying to their families "If we cut out hamburger for three more meals a month and substitute canned cat food we'll be able to afford that Alaska cruise!" Even if those folks could get on the boat, they aren't likely to drop a wad of cash while ashore. Except at the cat food section of the local grocery.
JULY 18, 2006 - 4:21 PM
The Amchitka Chickadee! Of course! What else could it be? You can thank MARY MINOR, of Anchorage, for identifying it. Frankly I didn't know what it was when I drew it, and now I can add it to my life list.
I hear some of you asking "What is an Amchitka Chickadee?" Amchitka is an island in the Aleutians. It was the site of a number of underground nuclear tests culminating in the Cannikin blast in 1971. The effect on those who were part of the project is still argued about today. Kudos to Mary for explaining the mutant bird with such a surprisingly apt backstory.
We had a wild variety of quality captions spanning topics from Frank's jet to bird flu, a testament to the quirky fertility of the human imagination.
JULY 11, 2006 - 5:08 PM
C. HOEHN, of Haines proves that while the blogoshere may think that Ted Stevens is a techno-ninny Luddite throwback to a simpler time, Alaskans proudly see him as faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive (Hell, he got us an entire railroad back in the 80's), and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. The Treasury building, for example.
As for those smarty-pants bloggers, if they're so damn superior, how is it that Ted is in the driver's seat when it comes to making the calls on regulating the internet? On the information superhighway Sen. Stevens may be slow, but he's ahead of them.
JULY 4, 2006 - 2:40 PM
What? TIM KELLEY again? Tim, of Anchorage fended off an unusually high number of inspired contributors who were loaded for bear. There were so many fine captions that the judges decided to spread the glory around and for the first time award honorable mentions.
But first, all please snort and huff as we commend Mr. Kelley for coming up with an imaginative leap to a whole new category of problem bear: Yogi, identity thief. Before you pooh-pooh the danger of a bear with your plastic, consider the damage a lactating sow could inflict on your credit rating with a trip through the meat department of your local grocer. And who here believes that a cashier is going to confiscate a card from a bear? That is IF they even check the signature...which prompts another new problem bear category: Boo-Boo the forgery artist.
JUNE 27, 2006 - 3:48 PM
Let us now praise the long-lost TIM KELLEY, of Anchorage, for a winning caption that oozed acid the way a snail oozes slime. Tim set up his stinging jab with a sly invocation of traditional Alaska cannery toil as a parallel to the mind-numbing, soul-dulling tedium of staying on the Exxon trail. Smart, hard-hitting stuff. If gastropods could howl, they'd be baying piteously all the way to Houston. Good thing they can't.
Exxon may never cough up a nickel in punitive damages, but at least Tim's caustic jibe should stick in their craw. That's one of the beauties of political cartoons- they can make miscreants pay in a metaphoric sense even if they won't pay actual money. And sure, we'd rather have the money, but if I had to choose between a world without money and a world without cartoons, it wouldn't be hard to decide.
JUNE 20, 2006 - 4:11 PM
Fran Hemmesch of Anchorage is our wit of the week, emerging from a tough field of entries. Fran played off the drawng with a trenchant simplicity that was neatly compact and cleverly concieved. A standing cyber-ovation for Fran.
Same time, different 'toon next Tuesday.
Peter Dunlap-Shohl
ADN division of arbitrary jurisprudence
JUNE 13, 2006 - 2:28 PM
Three cheers and a coughing fit to Kris Minard from the very farthest reaches of Southern Alaska. So far south in fact, that she isn't even in Alaska. She sent her caption from Clayton, Montana.
But if our govermennt can hire Pac/West out of Portland to improve Alaska's public image, then we surely can accept advice from Outside about improving our health.
Plus it's free, which makes it $3 million cheaper than the Portland PR possee. And since when does a real Alaskan pass up a freebie? Case Closed.
Thanks to all who sent captions. We'll do it again next Tuesday.
It's free, after all.
JUNE 6, 2006 - 3:18 PM
Glory hound Clayton Awe, of Anchorage takes ALL THREE of the top spots! OK, strictly speaking the winning caption was more a gag line than a political cartoon. But it was such a good one that the judges were seduced (unlike Sourdough Pete) by the sheer beauty of its off-the-wall invention. At least, we hope it's invention...
We'll return to weightier topics next week when we settle the PPT debate, outline our vision of a long term fiscal plan, and sort out the subsistence problem all in one master cartoon.
In the spirit of open debate, the judges welcome disputation, rebuttal, recrimination, charges of Lysenkoism, and questions concerning our sanity. Post with abandon!
MAY 30, 2006 - 5:54 PM
Lois Herm of Anchorage is our winner for this week. Her stinging caption is a potent expression of her point of view, stated with elegant economy. The judges salute her and make a mental note never to do anything that would incur her wrath. This is clearly a woman better left unantagonized.
Thanks to all who sent captions. Come back next week for a new round of creative spleen venting. It's for your own good. We all know what happens when a spleen goes too long without being vented. The little sucker can explode, landing you in the hospital, driving up insurance rates for all of us. (And sure, they can give you a transplant but who really wants a stranger's spleen? Wouldn't you find yourself getting all wrought up over stuff you didn't care about before?)
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